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New shoes!…(a trip to the mall)

I bought some new shoes today. Which means I had to go to the mall. The mall if you didn’t already know this about me is my least favorite place. There are only a few places I’d rather not be than the mall.

  • That hole they found Saddam in.
  • A bathroom stall next to Larry Craig.
  • On a flight with some of those drunk pilots.

And the mall comes in forth.

So I am driving to the mall and as I know I’m close when I start to see homeless people on nearly every corner with signs trying to get money that I want to spend on myself.

When I finally find a parking space and get into this God-forsaken place some lady working at the perfume counter mistakes me for a garbage can and hands me some trash. Apparently I look like a guy who wants to hold onto a piece of paper with cologne sprayed on it.

I get to the store that sells the shoes I like. I find a pair right away. Get them in my size and get the hell out of there.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Look at that manly leg.

I love that new shoe smell, it sure beats the “old” shoe smell my other shoes had.

It feels weird walking in these new shoes, but it does with all shoes. On my way into work tonight I kept speeding more than I normally do since I’m not used to these shoes. Do you think I could use that as an excuse if I got pulled over?

“I’m sorry officer, I didn’t realize I was going 95 in a 55. I just got these new shoes and they aren’t broken in yet.”

Do you guys hate the mall as much as I do? Is there a place you hate as much as I hate the mall? (other than work of course.)


I almost forgot the word of the day…

Word of the Day –

Hot Caesar Pleaser

After receiving head, a man finishes across the forehead of his lady friend. This will give the lucky lady the appearance of a Greek grass crown.


26 Responses

  1. I hate the mall and I hate shopping, the only thing I like shopping for is new shoes, which I only get at journey’s. Shoes are also the only item of clothing that I spend money, new shoe smell is amazing; and I also like buying socks from Journey’s.

    Places that I also hate going, or hate to be at more than the mall:

    Church (especially Catholic and Evangelical)
    Airports (and I travel for work so I am there at least twice a week)
    Downtown Minneapolis on Friday or Saturday nights

  2. Shoes smell awesome when you open the box….I went to Zumies or whatever the hell it’s called…And new socks are the best!

    Oh man…All of those places suck…I think Minneapolis anytime is HORRIBLE…

  3. happy new shoes!

    i love the mall bt i dont appreciate much the rubber smell of new pair of shoes.

    visit my blog if you have time..i picked a new pair of footwear too last Friday. 🙂

  4. Thanks!

    The rubber and leather smell is great!..

    What is the url to your blog?….

  5. hmmmm guess appreciatiion of fragrances vary from one person to another.right? 🙂

    thanks for visiting myblog.

  6. That is true…A lot of people wear perfume/colonge I can’t stand but it apparently smells good to them. (or they can’t smell)…

  7. shoes are whiter than your socks. you should have gotten new socks too. I hate going to the mall too. I hate the bums trying to get money by holding a sign. I wonder would people gave me money if I walked along the streets near the stop lights that said “Give me money because I just want some money. I won’t buy beer and cigarettes like the bums.” Last Sunday our car was approached by one of them. He had on some nice looking jeans. By nice looking, I mean new, and name brand.

  8. Yeah, I probably should have but I’m pretty lazy and didn’t want to look for any…

    I’m sure you could get some money…Not sure how much though….

    You should have told him to pawn his jeans…

  9. Lazy ass…

    I wanna try it someday.

    I should have. I bet as soon as we pulled away, he went into the gas station he was in front of and got some beer.

  10. i dont like those shoes….

    and i like the mall as long as its not ghetto and im not with annoying people…

  11. now see, that’s the fun crazy Steve I miss reading. loved ur list btw….LMFAO

    ditto on the MALL :[ oh YAY! oh YAY! ~NOT!! ;{


  12. oh and kool shoes there, Steve! 😉
    looks like u lucked out, yes?

  13. Jimmy – I work all night…I can be lazy if I want to!…That’s all homeless people do..Smoke drugs and drink…

    Amanda – Yes you do, don’t lie….All malls are ghetto….

    CG – Yeah, the mall is mighty bunk….I think I lucked out…I love em’ so far….Until they get all dirty…

  14. Love the new kicks King Steve. I used to like the mall until it became filled with oily-skinned teenagers making out with each other like they’re in the Blue Lagoon or something. Totally gross.

  15. Thanks!…

    The malls here are full of gangster wanna be fucks with their pants hanging off their asses…

  16. Oh god, do I hate the mall. I’d rather have a nice Sunday dinner made by (and eaten off of) a retired hooker’s ass than go there. It seems that all malls are universally packed with pricks dressed up like vampires ‘n shit.

    I swear, every time I go there, I think that Nosferatu’s minions have risen from the grave for vengeance.

  17. yeah fuck malls. but there are some cute girls every now and then. giggity giggity!

  18. More idiots than hot chicks…

  19. DT – I’ve done that…Great ribs!…

  20. I like those shoes. They are pretty radical.

  21. Radical is the word that I was thinking of…That and tubular…

  22. I love new shoes!! yay!

    you know, i just noticed i’m not on your blogroll and i’m devastated. now i have to go drink. thanks alot.

  23. Thanks!…

    Oh wow…You aren’t…I will solve that…

  24. yay!! thank you… it’s about fucking time! jeez!

  25. i love the mal, you can loook at thing you ca’nt affore yet and save mnehy to by them .

  26. Lisa – Are you really that drunk!?…These are the greatest comments ever!!

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