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The worst part….

I was sitting at my house today eating a bowl of Ramen noodles and I started thinking….

 What could be the worst possible thing to happen to me. I came up with a few things…

  • Stepping on a bear trap.
  • Having a pine tree fall on you and being trapped underneath.
  • Running backwards through a corn field naked.
  • Being stuck in the middle of the ocean on a raft with Rosie O’Donnell.
  • Losing both arms at the shoulder.

I’ve concluded that the last one would probably be the worst. The other ones are bad but let me break it down for you.

If you lost both arms how would you…

  • Tie your shoes.
  • Eat.
  • Put clothes on.
  • PISS.
  • Wipe your ass.
  • Jerk off.

As you can see not having arms would suck balls. I’m not sure anything could be worse.

Is there anything I missed? What could be worse than losing both of your arms at the shoulder?

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37 Responses

  1. STOP WASTING OUR TIME!!! LET’S HERE ABOUT THE LAUNCH

  2. Hahaha…

    The launch would be a short blog…It was fun and all but nothing that would be interesting to anyone except you and me….

  3. i’M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT

  4. I hear fishing Mille Lacs on a launch with a couple of cool coworkers is an excellent topic and past time to read about…..hurry up and write the blog about the trip u a-hole.

  5. The best thing is if you lost your arms at the shoulders u wouldnt be able to type this shitty blog….

  6. and somehow if you lost your arms u still would find a way to jerk off…ha ha

  7. Haha…

    M. A. Bennett you’re the best!….

    The launch wouldn’t be an very good blog….

  8. The launch story is way better then you yapping about eating ramen noodles…shut up and write about some real important facts…fishing and drinking beer and my awesome pretzels i made…

  9. YEAH YOUR RIGHT QUEEN STEVE, WE’D MUCH RATHER HEAR ABOUT YOUR NO -HANDED JERK OFFS

  10. Something much more important then the fishing trip to blog about and Im sure many others would enjoy is a blog about Pamela Andersons big boobs and How they have evolved over the years.

  11. NOW THERE’S BLOG

  12. If you lost both your arms u could still wipe your ass by rubbing it on the carpet in your trailer…

  13. I was actually going to blog about fake boobs tonight…But decided against it at the last minute…

    That is just gross….

  14. fun bags are fun whether its real or fake…real boobs are just fatty tissue, fake boobs are syntheic material. which do you prefer? and does a man really care as long as they look good? I wouldnt think that real ones that are all stretched out and looking like flap jack pancakes is very fun for a guy to fondle and gaze at …then you should take the fake one over that….the fake ones may be hard as a cement brick but it will look better as your bonein her…. or just keep the lights off. remember my theory it all looks the same from behind….

  15. Hahaha…

    Noone want’s to look at nasty boobs….I have no problems with fake ones as long as they aren’t HUGE….

  16. YOU WISH YOU COULD TOUCH ANY BOOBS

  17. yes real is always the way to go but if a gal has to go synthetic cant blame her for wanting nice looking boobs…problem with fake ones is when your 80 and the rest of your shit is sagging those titties are going to be up to her throat and that wont look so hot…

  18. Theres this guy Joe I know that I work with that may have gone on a Launch on Mille Lacs and it just so happens He probably wouldnt touch a boob if it flopped out into his hands

  19. Im out of here it time to put a coat of nail polish on

  20. Hahaha…

    I don’t even know what to say to this….

  21. HEY SEAT PISSER

  22. I have recently uploaded my picture enjoy

  23. it didnt work I must have broken it…ha ha ha ha h ah

  24. Shark Attack, nothing fears me more.

  25. First of all “Being stuck in the middle of the ocean on a raft with Rosie O’Donnell.” isnt half bad, Push her into the water and she will annoy the sharks away.

    Secondly, There is a solution to having no arms. Take ur legs away too. Now you dont have shoes to tie. End of story. With no arms or legs, you dont have to worry about alot of stuff, people do it for you.

    I told a guy once, I want to be so rich I have my own personal ass wiper. Well that could be possible and not be rich. all i have to do is not have any arms or legs.

  26. Hello,

    I a written some words for you aaa Mr. King Steve. THey are in aa your aa About section off your aa weby page. I want very much for you to read this aa typings that I typed, and tell mee aaa whata you think about my underwears..

    Angela

  27. how about having losing your dick and arms?

  28. What if you had your arms and legs, but tragically lost your manly apparatus (a.k.a. junk…a.k.a. twigs ‘n berries) in a freak chainsaw accident? Would that be worse than no arms/legs? And if that happened, would you lose all your testerone and pretty much become like a woman? (not sure if that’s scientifically true; you tell me, does testosterone grow in your balls?)

    I guess it would be shitty to become a pansy-ass girly-man with no junk, but you could always have a surgery to get those nice fake boobs you fellas seem to like so much; at least then you’d be a girly-man with something to offer…

  29. LOL…jimmy read my mind as I was writing that….

  30. umm loosing your arms while stuck on a raft with rosie odonnel….

  31. How about having to read all these fucking lame ass fucking comments? That’s fucking pretty shitty too if you ask me. In terms of having no arms, the solution if fucking easy. You find a chick with no legs and make a deal – you carry her around in a backpack (or one of those fucking baby things people wear in front – and she jerks you off, wipes your ass, gives you blow jobs, etc – it would be a fucking match made in heaven. Unless it was fucking Rosie.

  32. Would you make out with Rosie if you were stuck on that ocean raft? Don’t lie.

  33. Brock – I hate sharks…Unless they are eating those douche bag lookin Jersey fags….

    Big Guy – There is no way I’d chop ANY body parts off!…

    Jimmy – I might as well be dead then…

    Romi – Why do you think I don’t fuck around with chain saws?…Heh…

    Amanda – I HATE Rosie…I would jump in shark infested waters and drown if that happened…

    N. A. Hole – How about having to respond to them!…HAHA!…That would be awesome…I’m going to try and find this chick tomorrow…

    Abarclay – NO…You couldn’t get me drunk enough to touch that slob…

  34. maybe someone already said it……….

    prostate anything!

  35. Ow….

    Thanks for putting that in my head…

  36. heehee, a tree fell on my mom once. they were out of houses.

  37. oh, nice blog btw. i see you all the time on a-holes blog. wanted to stop by and check you out…

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